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Blonde Jokes


  • There were three girls, a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. They were all in the fifth grade. A 17 year-old guy comes and asks one of them out. But which did he ask? Easy. The blonde one, because she's also 17.!
  • How do you kill a Blonde? - Put a scratch-and-sniff tab on the bottom of the pool!
  • What happens when a Blonde eats a mosquito? - She has more brain cells in her stomach than her head.

** A guy walks into a bar and there are a whole bunch of blondes chanting "51 days! 51 days!..." The guy walks up to the bartender and asks him "what are they celebrating about". The bartender says "I don't know". The guy is curious so he desides to ask one of the blondes. he asks, "Can one of you please tell me why you are chanting '51 days' and why are you all celebrating". one of the blondes proudly answers " we just finished this puzzle. The box said '3-4 years' but we finished it in 51 days".

** One day a blonde was sitting out in a rowboat in the middle of a cornfield.
Another blonde drove by and stopped. She hollered out to the blonde in the rowboat :
"You're the reason we blondes have a bad name. If I knew how to swim I'd go out there and hit you"

** A Blonde is out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
"Yoohoo" she shouts, "how can I get to the other side?"
The second Blonde looks up the river then down the river then shouts back, "You are on the other side."


 Brunette Jokes

  • What's black and blue and brown and laying in a ditch ? A brunette who's told too many blonde jokes.
  • Why are so many blonde jokes one-liners? - So brunettes can remember them.
  • What's a brunette's mating call? - "Has the blonde left yet?"
  • How do you describe the perfect brunette? - 3 feet tall and a flat head to rest your beer on.
  • Why did the brunette cross the road? Never mind, what is she doing out of the kitchen?
  • Whats good about a brunette midget? She's only half as ugly!
  • Why do brunettes take the pill? - Wishful thinking.
  • What do you call a good looking man with a brunette? - A hostage.

 

 





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