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| Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Monday 28th January, 2004 105,000 subscribers ___________________________________________________________ Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving Joke Email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site. + The Starter ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Just three more application forms to complete. However, with each form I finish, I get the impending sense that I'm just one step closer to that inevitable 'Thanks, but no thanks' email/letter.. and after about ten of them, I'll be headed straight back into the safe, homely environment of higher education. Roll on my MBA! Tom Evans Editor - Joke Email webmaster@jokeemail.com + Totally NEW Funny Pic: CLEAN: End Racism.. http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/end_racism.htm AOL + Topical Joke: Mars Rover NASA says it will take two weeks to fix the software on the Mars Rover. Actually, it should only take 3 minutes to fix. They've budgeted the rest of the time for being on hold with Dell Technical Support. + General Joke The scary thing is.. I can actually start to relate to some of these. 25 SIGNS That Prove - "You've Grown Up".... 1. Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. 3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge. 4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed. 5. You hear your favorite song on an elevator. 6. You watch the Weather Channel. 7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up. 8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14. 9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up." 10. You're the one calling the police because those damn kids next door won't turn down the stereo. 11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you. 12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore. 13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up. 14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonalds leftovers. 15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt. 16. You no longer take naps from noon to 6 PM. 17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one. 18. Eating a basket of Buffalo wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach. 19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests. 20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff." 21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time. 22. "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces, "I'm never going to drink that much again." 23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work. 24. You no longer drink at home to save money before going to a bar. 25. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you. For more jokes, stroll on over to: http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm + Contact Information ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info. Advertising info:http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm Everything else:http://www.jokeemail.com/contactus.htm This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X © Copyright 1998-2004 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved. |
