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| Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Monday 5th January, 2004 105,000 subscribers Congratulations! You have been chosen to receive a chance to win a Playstation 2! Please click here to complete the entry form. You are also eligible to win a laptop computer, a flat screen monitor, an IPOD player, $250 Cash and a Flatscreen TV. http://mocda3.com/1/c/58526/145941/327669/327669 AOL users go here ___________________________________________________________ Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving Joke Email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site. + The Starter ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ So, for the majority of working folk, it was back to work this morning after a few weeks of Christmas holiday bliss. I include myself in that description, but with just two caveats: 1) I worked most of the Christmas holiday, including Boxing Day 2) I worked the final day of my notice this very morning, so am once again OFFICIALLY unemployed. Boy it feels good! No more 6am starts, back-breaking lifting, life-sapping counting, and moronic 'public' asking which aisle the eggs are on. And this time it's for good. Mark my words dear friends.. "I will not return to work at the supermarket EVER again." .. well, unless I'm really, really desperate.. Anyway, enough of this mindless banter, there are more important things to bring to your attention. Mainly, I sweated blood, tears and copious amounts of body fluid in a intimate marathon session with my scanner to get my South East Asia photos online for you lucky people today. Those readers who pay attention more closely than others will notice that Asia was the THIRD leg of my trip, and I've handily skipped over my Australia photos. This isn't the case... it's just the Asia pictures are presently in a better state to display online. There's good banter, some great photos, and of course the obligatory few shots of your favourite Jokemaster in various states of intoxication. Not that I condone that behaviour in the slightest you understand. Tom Evans Editor - Joke Email webmaster@jokeemail.com + 2003 Holiday Photos, continued CLEAN: South East Asia... UNcovered! http://www.jokeemail.com/travels/asia/asia1.htm AOL + Win $10,000 Cash OR Win a Trip to the Canyon Ranch Spa OR Win and Entertainment Center with a Plasma Screen TV!!! Print Free Coupons! Enter Great Sweepstakes! Everyday is SAVINGS! http://mocda4.com/1/c/58526/109732/327669/327669 AOL users go here + Dirty Joke Relationship Marketing 101. . . Revised People often ask for an explanation of "Marketing." Well, here it is: You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed." That's Direct Marketing. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you says, "She's fantastic in bed." That's Advertising. You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed," That's Telemarketing. You see a guy at a party, you straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, "May I," and reach up to straighten his tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed." That's Public Relations. You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, I hear you're fantastic in bed," That's Brand Recognition. You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk him into going home with your friend. That's a Sales Rep. Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you. That's Tech Support. You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be handsome men in all these houses you're passing. So you climb onto the roof of one situated towards the center and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!" . That's Junk Mail. You see two great looking brothers at a party. You decide to take them both home. That's a 2 for 1 sale. You are at a party, this well-built man walks up to you and gropes your breast and grabs your ass . That's Arnold Schwarzenegger. You like it, but 10 years later your attorney decides you were offended and files suit. That's America. For more jokes, stroll on over to: http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm + Contact Information ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info. Advertising info:http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm Everything else:http://www.jokeemail.com/contactus.htm This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X © Copyright 1998-2004 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved. |
