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| Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Monday 13th January, 2003100,000 subscribers Did the Holidays leave you SWIMMING IN DEBT and feeling FLAT-BROKE? Free, Reputable Non-Profit Service Reveals Secrets Of Reducing Debt ! Stop Collection Calls! Pay off your debt faster! Save thousands in debt and interest payments! CLICK NOW! http://mocda.com/1/c/58526/86705/235226/235226 AOL users click here ___________________________________________________________ Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving Joke Email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site. + The Starter ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Continuing the Year 2003 Preview... However, just before I get to that, I hope a few of you made a few bucks on my "anti" tip of the week. Friday, I wrote: "For the sportsfans and gamblers among you, my tip of the week is the Falcons over the Eagles... Vick won't win or lose the game alone, but he sure gives the Falcons a good shot for an upset. Mark my words." Result? The Eagles nailed the Falcons. Yeh, nice one Tom. As I advised, anyone following my tips needs a frontal labotomy, or has waaaaaay too much cash in their pocket. If you're the former, please don't hunt me down; and if you're the latter, I'll send the mailing address for donations ;-) Come Friday, I'll have my "anti" tips for the weekend's football. By the way, I wonder just how many people would actually have the nuts to decide on a gambling pick, then bet AGAINST it? Seriously, the run of luck I've been having, I'd be tempted to do so.. One last thing: ER. Wow. What a unbelievable first episode of the series. There are very few television moments that make your hair stand on end, and genuinely shock you into taking notice. The helicopter slicing off Romano's arm.. wow.. one of those TV scenes you'll never forget. Like Jordan's last shot in the NBA Finals, and Dr Greene killing a serial killer patient, these are TV gold. Actually, I think I'll save the remainder of the Preview for Wednesday. Have a good one! Tom Evans Editor - Joke Email webmaster@jokeemail.com + **** Buy tax-free cigarettes ***** Save time! Save money! Your favorite brand name cigarettes at tax-free prices delivered right to your home . . . like Marlboro full-flavor Red Box at just $29.95 a carton, Basic at $29.45 or Winston at $32.45. Or for real savings try one of our own discount brands that have all the flavor of your current favorite but without the cost. Prices start at just $9.95 with a no hassle return policy. To start saving today click here now (U.S. residents only). http://mocda.com/1/c/58526/65749/235226/235226 AOL users click here + TOTALLY new FunPages... ADULT: NEXT Year's Hottest Christmas Toy! http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/next_xmas.htm AOL + Old Age Joke You may enjoy this short story. While waiting for my first appointment in the reception room of a new dentist, I noticed his certificate, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered that a tall, handsome boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 40 years ago. Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was too old to have been my classmate. After he had examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended the local high school. "Yes," he replied. "When did you graduate?" I asked. He answered, "In 1957." "Why, you were in my class!" I exclaimed. He looked at me closely and then asked, "What did you teach?" + Did your DEBT PILE UP over the Holidays? Free, Reputable Non-Profit Service Reveals Secrets Of Reducing Debt ! Stop Collection Calls! Pay off your debt faster! Save thousands in debt and interest payments! CLICK NOW! http://mocda.com/1/c/58526/86704/235226/235226 AOL users click here + VERY DIRTY Joke A man longs to wed a maiden with her virtue intact. He searches for one but resigns himself to the fact that every female over the age of 10 in his town has been at it. Finally he decides to take matters in hand and adopts a baby girl from the orphanage. He raises her until she is walking and talking and then sends her away to a monastery for safekeeping until marrying age. After many years she finally reaches maturity and he retrieves her from the monastery and marries her. After the wedding they make their way back to his house and into the bedroom where they both prepare themselves for the consummation. They lie down together in his bed and he reaches over for a jar of petroleum jelly. "Why the jelly," she asks him? "So I do not hurt your most delicate parts during the act of lovemaking," he replies. "Well why don't you just spit on your c*ck like the monks did?!" For more jokes, stroll on over to: http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm + Contact Information ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ U wanna leave?Click the link at the end of this email Advertising info:http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm Everything else:http://www.jokeemail.com/contactus.htm ___________________________________________________________ This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X © Copyright 1998-2004 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved. |
