|
JOIN! |
Have you subscribed to Joke Email? The funniest weekly jokes >>
|
|
|
||||||
| Have you subscribed to Joke Email? The funniest weekly jokes >> | ||||||||
| Welcome to JokeEmail.com's Joke Email ! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Friday 15th March, 2002162,000 subscribers FREE Satellite TV System, NO Credit Check! 50 channels only $22.99 a month! FREE Professional Installation! FREE Shipping, Limited Time Offer!!! http://www.jokeemail.com/free/satdish.htm AOL ___________________________________________________________ Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving Joke Email because you subscribed either at the JokeEmail.com site, or through a SuperTAF Tell a Friend form on other humor sites. Removal instructions are located the end of this Ezine. + The Starter ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Hey, Have a great weekend, I'm counting down the hours until my dissertation has to be presented. Basically, my scrabble game can *almost* play against the computer - should be fixed later today, then it's just drawing the gameboard and I'm almost there... Take it easy ;-) Tom Evans Editor - Joke Email webmaster@jokeemail.com + TOTALLY new FunPages... ADULT: Asking for a raise can be TRICKY! http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/raise.htm AOL CLEAN: Viagra and Prozac? Sounds Interesting! http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/prozac.htm AOL + Kid Joke A mother and father took their 6 year old son to a nudist beach. As the boy walked along the beach, he noticed that some of the ladies had boobs bigger than his mother's, and asked her why. She told her son, "The bigger they are ... the dumber the person is." The boy, pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocean but returns to tell his mother that many of the men have larger members than his dad. His mother replied, "The bigger they are ...the dumber the person is." Again satisfied with his answer, the boy returns to the ocean to play. Shortly after, the boy returned again. He promptly told his mother, "Daddy is talking to the dumbest girl on the beach and the longer he talks, the dumber he gets." + FREE Satellite TV System, NO Credit Check! 50 channels only $22.99 a month! FREE Professional Installation! FREE Shipping, Limited Time Offer!!! http://www.jokeemail.com/free/satdish.htm AOL + Sexist Joke Man Speak! What does he really mean when he says "It's a guy thing?" Here's how to translate. Male Language Patterns: "I can't find it," REALLY MEANS, "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless." "That's women's work," REALLY MEANS, "It's dirty, difficult and thankless." "It's a guy thing," REALLY MEANS, "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical." "Can I help with dinner?" REALLY MEANS, "Why isn't it already on the table?" "It would take too long to explain," REALLY MEANS, "I have no idea how it works." "Take a break, honey, you're working too hard," REALLY MEANS, "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner." "That's interesting, dear," REALLY MEANS, "Are you still talking?" "It's really a good movie," REALLY MEANS, "It's got fast cars, lots of pyrotechnics, and no discernable plot." "You know how bad my memory is," REALLY MEANS, "I remember the words to the theme song of "Cops", the address of the first girl I ever kissed, the Vehicle Identification number of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday." "Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself. It's no big deal," REALLY MEANS, "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt." "What did I do this time?" REALLY MEANS, "What did you catch me doing?" "She's one of the rabid feminists," REALLY MEANS, "She refused to make my coffee." "I heard you," REALLY MEANS, "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me." "You really look terrific in that outfit," REALLY MEANS, "Please don't try on another outfit. I'm starving." "I brought you a present," REALLY MEANS, "It was free ice scraper night at the hockey game." "We share the housework," REALLY MEANS, "I make the messes. She cleans them up." "I don't need to read the instructions," REALLY MEANS, "I am perfectly capable of screwing it up without printed help." Hope this helps clear up the misunderstanding between the sexes. For more jokes, click here http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm + Contact Information ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ To unsubscribe:leave-jokeemail@relay.netatlantic.com Advertising inquiries:advertinfo@jokeemail.com Everything else:webmaster@jokeemail.com ___________________________________________________________ This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X © Copyright 1998-2004 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved. |
